Notes

Outline

Sentences in Need of Revision

Sentences 1.   Thank you for taking time to meet with me, I enjoyed visiting with you Sherry.

Sentences 1.   Thank you for taking time to meet with me[,] I enjoyed visiting with you Sherry.

Sentences 1.   Thank you for taking time to meet with me[.] I enjoyed visiting with you Sherry.

Sentences 1.   Thank you for taking time to meet with me[.] I enjoyed visiting with you[ ] Sherry.

Sentences 1.   Thank you for taking time to meet with me[.] I enjoyed visiting with you[,] Sherry.

Sentences 2.    Real economic growth slowed to 0.5% in the fourth quarter, that slowdown is consistent with the November, 1989 forecast.

Sentences 2.    Real economic growth slowed to 0.5% in the fourth quarter[,] [t]hat slowdown is consistent with the November, 1989 forecast.

Sentences 2.    Real economic growth slowed to 0.5% in the fourth quarter[.] [T]hat slowdown is consistent with the November, 1989 forecast.

Sentences 2.    Real economic growth slowed to 0.5% in the fourth quarter[.] [T]hat slowdown is consistent with the November[,] 1989 forecast.

Sentences 2.    Real economic growth slowed to 0.5% in the fourth quarter[.] [T]hat slowdown is consistent with the November[ ] 1989 forecast.

Sentences  But use two commas if the day’s date is used with the year: November [17 ] 1989[ ] forecast.

Sentences  But use two commas if the day’s date is used with the year: November [17,] 1989[ ] forecast.

Sentences  But use two commas if the day’s date is used with the year: November [17,] 1989[,] forecast.

Sentences  Don’t forget to use the second comma. November [17,] 1989[,] forecast.

Sentences 3.   There is alot of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls, however, our company now has less employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is alot of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls, however, our company now has less employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls, however, our company now has less employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[,] however, our company now has less employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[.] However, our company now has less employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[;] however, our company now has less employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[;] however, our company now has  less employees than it needs to  meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[;] however, our company now has [fewer] employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[;] however, our company now has [fewer] employees than it needs to meet demand for it’s products.

Sentences 3.   There is [a lot] of pressure on companies to trim their payrolls[;] however, our company now has [fewer] employees than it needs to meet demand for [its] products.

Sentences 4.   The network of operating systems are supported by the main disk drive.

Sentences 4.   The network of operating systems are supported by the main disk drive.

Sentences 4.   The network of operating systems  [is] supported by the main disk drive.

Sentences 4.   The network (of operating systems) [is] supported by the main disk drive.

Sentences 4.   The network                                              [is] supported by the main disk drive.

Sentences 5.   There’s lots of tricks to being  a good writer.

Sentences 5.   There’s lots of tricks to being        a good writer.

Sentences 5.   There [are] lots of tricks to being  a good writer.

Sentences 6.   A comparison of these results with those from three earlier studies indicate that zinc levels consistently exceed acceptable limits.

Sentences 6.   A comparison of these results with those from three earlier studies indicate that zinc levels consistently exceed acceptable limits.

Sentences 6.   A comparison of these results with those from three earlier studies indicate[s] that zinc levels consistently exceed acceptable limits.

Sentences 7.   She was healthy, wealthy, and            an athlete.

Sentences 7.   She was healthy, wealthy, and            an athlete.

Sentences 7.   She was healthy, wealthy, and            [athletic].

Sentences 8.   My primary responsibilities are essentially to manage staff, to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques, and reorganizing the office.

Sentences 8.   My primary responsibilities are [essentially] to manage staff, to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques, and reorganizing the office.

Sentences 8.   My primary responsibilities are    [                 ] to manage staff, to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques, and reorganizing the office.

Sentences 8.   My primary responsibilities are [                 ] to manage staff, to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques, and reorganizing the office.

Sentences 8.   My primary responsibilities are [                 ] to manage staff, to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques, and [to reorganize] the office.

Sentences 8.   to manage staff, to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques, and       to reorganize the office.

Sentences 8.   to manage staff, to reorganize the office, and to create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques.

Sentences 8.   to manage staff,     reorganize the office, and     create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques.

Sentences 8.   to manage staff,     reorganize the office, and     create a new data base of specific economic reporting techniques.

Sentences 8.   to manage staff,     reorganize the office, and     create a new [database] of specific economic reporting techniques.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse then insulting our clients intelligence, by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse then insulting our clients intelligence, by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our clients intelligence, by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our clients intelligence, by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence, by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence[,] by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence[ ] by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence[ ] by making errrors in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence[ ] by making [errors] in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence[ ] by making [errors] in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and grammer.

Sentences 9.   There’s nothing worse [than] insulting our [clients’] intelligence[ ] by making [errors] in spelling, punctuation, proofreading, and [grammar].